Kitchen Walls

Here is the door wall leading to the hallway, it is lavendar and the walls to the left and right are eggplant

Having finished painting my living room, my next room is the Kitchen. The goal is to create a space in the whole apartment that flows from room to room especially the hallway, living room, dining room, and kitchen area because those rooms are more open to each other.

In the kitchen I chose to paint the walls eggplant. It looks hip and modern and I couldn’t be more pleased. I chose to paint the two longest walls of this galley style kitchen eggplant while painting the two other walls opposite each other, a lighter color to keep the space from becoming a dark cave. One wall is the window wall, and the opposite wall is the entrance to the hallway, so that when you are walking towards the kitchen from the hallway, you first see the window wall.

I chose to paint it a lavender but as I am painting it, I am not as excited about the color as I am with the eggplant. I am having second thoughts. I feel it takes away from the modern look the eggplant gave and is making the kitchen too feminine. The colors coordinate well but I am just not sure about the overall look. I have yet to paint the trim (almond) so maybe that will help.

The options are leaving it, painting it eggplant so all walls are the same color, or painting over it a more neutral off-white or very light gray.

The color scheme, almond for the trim, eggplant for main wall color, lavender for the accent walls

Apartment Transformation

Been slowly making my space livable. Built a loft bed and got furniture, the wrong coffee table, hung tons of art… I just need to get more organized, buy a dining table and deck out my dining space which will be under the loft. That area will be romantic with curtains and lighting.

Going for the modern, soft industrial, romantic bohiemian look so we shall see!

Love Muffin Top Handles

One week to work off the love handles. I can still fit into the size 3 dress thank god but I don’t look as good in it as I did last year…

Baristers Ball is the event and I need to look smokin’ as I need the boost.

Back to the gym running my ass off.

That’s it. Also I am broke. So very broke.

Babies and Crap

At dinner with Nathan, I find we are suddenly surrounded by children because yay we came to the restarant during a birthday party!

I flat out asked him if he wants kids and “of course” he does. I asked him what his opinion of my feelings on kids where and he said that obviously it won’t work out in the future if we differ over a subject as important as having kids. Right, I totally get that. Basically he doesn’t mind dating me right now because he is not thinking about his future yet. That would be ok if I were on the same page but I am not, I am thinking about the future and I want to be with someone who I have a future with. Nathan just wants to be with me…for now.

Man Trap Alert!

Me: “I have huge thighs!”

Boy: “You’re a runner, you have runners thighs.”

Me: “So you are agreeing me that I have huge thighs?”

Babies

In all honesty, I truly do not understand completely the desire to have babies. I welcome your insights though. I just see them as being expensive, smelly, noisy etc with a few cute things thrown in. The biggest thing for me is that they ruin a womans figure, let’s face it your body will never be the same, ever. And along those lines, they really age you. Pretty much everyone I see on facebook that I know is now having babies and the result is the same. I am slightly more sympathetic to adoption, that makes the most sense to me but even still…time consuming and expensive.

I suppose if I were to compare babies to my dog (oh yes I am going there much to the horror of parents I’m sure) then I get that they do funny cute things that enrich our lives. Even dogs are messy (but not AS bad) and they are sometimes expensive (but not AS bad) but they are 90% of the time so terrifically cute at least my dog is. Sometimes she is so cute I can’t stand it and it pains me to the point of crying that she will die some day soon. I love her so much and she makes me so happy…is that how it is with kids?

So why do I not want babies? I admit that they do things mildly amusing and cute and some babies are not ugly… But my initial reaction is to wonder why a couple would want to strain their relationship or why they want to be more stressed, have less sex, spend less time together, and why the woman wants to never ever be at the top of her game physically.

I guess I am not maternal and I think I am ok with that, I mean not everyone likes dogs either.

Too Damn Old

In two months I will be 27. I never thought I would say it but I sort of want to get married. Which says a lot for me since I have been proposed to several times in my life and never went through with it. It’s not really marriage I want, I couldn’t care less about a paper contract from the government, it’s the companionship I want. I like the idea of going through life with a best friend that is on your side, gives you the benefit-of-the-doubt, does stuff together, is bored together, sex, everyday or nearly. I don’t have this with Nathan and I want to more than anything.

He is with me because “we have fun together”.

I think I might be ready to try and find someone who wants to have fun together and fullfills my needs.

Training

Signed up for a 10k which is no big deal but I want to perform well this year. I normally run 5 miles a day but the winter was particularly hard for me. Currently I am having issues with my foot as well.

Last summer at my peak I weighed 110 lbs and I loved it. Currently I am 123, so I hope to lose that winter blubber and get down to at least 115 by mid-April. I think I can do that with minimal torture. The trips to Bangor to visit my boyfriend doesn’t help my cause.

Oh well.

My dog is farting and I think she might need to go outside.

I Am Glad To Not Have Peaked in High School

At 26 years old, I look a hell of a lot better than I did at 16. I won’t lie, I was a awkward, nerdy and lame in highschool. I am still awkward, nerdy and rather lame but with a better sense of humor and a way better body and it helps that I know how to apply makeup as well. With the swell of highschool classmates joining facebook, it is nice to do the compare life game, and oh-so-good for the self esteem.

You know that saying about peaking in high school? Well lets just say I am GLAD I did not peak in high school. I am peaking now and have been for a while. Those that peaked when I was with them in highschool, well I did not know it at the time, but they definitely peaked then. Now, well, past due…

There are 4 things in life that age you fast. Smoking…I never smoked cigarettes. Well, there was that one time, but I thought it was pot, so it was an accident. Ok well smoking pot counts but I did not do enough for long enough for it to affect me, that year in highschool… Anyway moving on. Tanning. Girls I went to highschool and college with tanned will they looked like dusty mummies. Children. Giving birth wreaks havoc on your body and I am sorry but you won’t look the same without plastic surgery but even beyond the act of just giving birth, having kids is stressful (so I hear), and well you look old now. Drinking. Drinking especially at an early age, so all those parties I wasn’t invited to then, was actually a good thing. Now I enjoy my wine but I simply do not get drunk enough, often enough.

Looking through the photos of classmates who I have no seen in 8 years is both sad and satisfying. The boys I went to school with are now balding and look to be in their 40’s. Lets just say, if I ran into them in a bar and club (and I have) and they asked for my number (and they have) I would not give it to them (and I havn’t). Oh how I love to run into them (living 3 hours drive from where one grows up is simply not far enough!) because I enjoy how they pretend they were never jerks to me as a teen, I enjoy how they stare at my body because age has not ravaged me as much as them and their girlfriends (good genes + exercise + no kids), and I enjoy how I score a drink off of them, I enjoy telling them about my fabulous career, and I especially enjoy walking away from them giving them nothing in return leaving them only an eyeful of me. I love explaining to whatever friend I have with me that night how that person was a jerk to me and I love how my friend will say “THEY were a jerk to YOU?” in utter disbelief.

If you did not peak in high school, you know exactly what I am talking about.

Now to the girls. Most claim to absolutely “love being a homemaker” but I am sorry, I do not know how you can love being fat, having retarded looking children (also fat as most kids are these days), living in the same crap town we grew up in, waiting at home while your balding, fat husband is working at the same paper mill/shoe factory that his sad father worked at. Nice deer/forest patterned couch too. yikes. They most likely named their child Kaitlyn or Kaiteigh or Kimberligh or Ashliegh or Ashlyn or…see a pattern? The best part is, they started getting knocked up right out of highschool. No ambition, no living, no chance.

Next time I am at a gallery opening, gala, or whatever swanky event I attend every week, I can think to myself about how glad I am to have not peaked in high school. Wait, no, I will be having too much fun, laughing, being around artists and successful people and creatives, and drinking wine.

I am glad to not have peaked in high school.